Julian Lennon's birthday

Someone on facebook posted an article on Julian Lennon on the day of his fiftieth birthday.  I clicked on it because the picture was so striking, his face so much like his father's only better.  I really haven't thought much about Julian since the eighties when he was "Romeo in black jeans" but he had my attention now.  I bet he would be a dream boat in black jeans, his wavy blonde hair, killer baby face, ok Im reading the article.  Probably shouldn't have read it because I spent the rest of the day dwelling on it.  His late father was quoted as explaining to some nosy reporter that his son Sean was a planned child and that Julian was not and there was a big difference.  His following words were equally rejecting towards his first born son, a man that is almost his complete clone, his own flesh and blood.  It made me hurt for the man, made me wonder if he is stronger for it or lives his life in doubt.  John Lennon left his entire estate to Yoko and Sean, and the denial of his existence still goes on today.  Julian is still getting snubbed like an old school illegitimate son.  I could understand the probability John had resentments towards Julian's mother, maybe he felt trapped, manipulated, so he wanted to send her a message, let her know how he feels but at the expense of his son?   I wondered why I was taking it so hard, later in the car driving to my sons school at pick up time.  Maybe its because I couldn't imagine hurting my son by even the idea of rejection and even if his mother tried to give him all the love and affection and reassurances that she had, it could never be enough.  His own father showed him he was less than, and as much as I complain about never being good enough for my mother, she never rejected me on this level.  The song "Woman" came on the radio, which prompted me to think about it again in the first place.  I will think about it every time I hear a song sung by him and wonder how his son functions in life at all.   On the flip side it gives me hope.  I allowed my mothers words of doubt ring in my head for decades but people who have received worse thrive.  Now I have to see if he is thriving.  I hope he is.